The bar was packed when I walked into Driftwood. Wait! The bar only has like four seats, so it was just regular. The owner gave instructions to stand beside the bar and wait, assuring me the people on the end were soon to be goners. While standing there, I became positive a murder was about to take place. As unbelievable as this information is, it is indeed fact. A man was leaning against the bar, reading a book, while standing in the center of the… SERVICE BAR AREA.
Are you on crack? Your pipe must be in your pocket. Do you need a light? We surround you with open arms and loads of information. This information begins with: Do not stand in the service bar area.
A server waiting for their drink is going to take the book you are reading and use it to smash your face flat. The same server will then poke you in both eyes, thus making it difficult to ever read again. This is not speculation. Even if a restaurant isn’t busy, expect someone to freak out. Usually freaking out about the service-bar-area-stander is the bartender. Bartenders almost attack customers for breaking this service industry rule.
For those not knowing what the service bar area is, please pay attention. People waiting tables ring in a drink. The bartender hears the machine make a funny noise while the paper appears with a drink name. This paper is gently placed on the service bar while the drink is being made. The server arrives expecting the drink-waiting-area to be empty. The server then stabs the ticket and moves on with their life.
A customer reading a book while standing in the service bar area has obviously never worked in a restaurant and should be escorted out of the building and placed directly into oncoming traffic. Plain & simple.
The scary book reader sat down beside me at the bar. This guy was hammered. Reading cannot be easy while experiencing a full blown buzz. His book is crooked. Reading is just not possible at this point. The worst part about sitting beside someone snockered at the bar is they become a small talker. Sometimes the small talker is acceptable, but slobbering-snockered-small-talker-service-bar-area-rule-breakers: not so much.
Snockered guy to the side decided to order the grossest thing on the menu. First up was the tongue of a cow. He didn’t stop with the tongue. Yes, his animal part preference continued. Driftwood is living on the animal part edge, as they also offer the cheeks of a fish. Sitting on the plate beside the cow tongue were the cheeks of an Alaskan halibut with asparagus puree and sauce vierge. Wow. This dish of animal part delish is called “Tongue & Cheek.”
The only reason I came to Driftwood that day was to taste the Maine lobster roll. Stepping onto the patio meant briefly escaping the drunk guy. After returning from the patio, he quickly began talking about rice. “Come down to Waco and taste some rice on my friend’s rice farm.” Really? Sorry guy, but I watch Another 48, ID, Forensic Files, and yada. We pay an extra $10 a month just to have these channels. The old rice tasting trick might work on some people, but consider yourself solo in this rice tasting farm scheme.
Minus the duo of rabbit, Driftwood’s menu is heavenly. Word on the street is this place has a lobster roll to reckon with. It’s $15 of small, but totally worth every cent. In Driftwood’s defense, this dish is located in the small plates section, so no yada’s allowed.
I can’t say enough about Driftwood. There’s no way anyone can slam this restaurant. It’s just not possible. Even the biggest complainers, living life for the sole purpose of complaining, cannot get away with it.
Executive chef Omar Flores puts a tantalizing spin on seafood like no other I’ve seen in Dallas. Menu changes make it even better, as he continues to periodically introduce new additions. At this point, Driftwood is my favorite restaurant in Dallas. Anyone not making their way to this Bishop Arts District gem is living a sheltered seafood life of utter sadness.
FIVE: High 5!
FOUR: Please & Thank You
TWO: Double Wow
ONE: Wow + Ouch = Wouch
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