Bone Daddy’s

Wowzer. After Hooters and Wolfies, it’s exciting to see the positives existing where tops & bottoms are concerned. Many businessmen feel instant manliness lunching with clients at Bone Daddy’s.

With a mandatory giggle, servers employed at this restaurant wear Daisy Duke’s & half shirts, as well as 2 – 4 inch heels.

Quests aren’t usually as exciting until dining in a handful of sex sells establishments. Certain places become offended at the very thought of not receiving automatic respect from consumers. I’m sorry. If you dress like a lady of the night, people will remain skeptical until brains, skills and less than scandalous thrills are a proven fact.

To update all on this adventure thus far, Hooters was a dirty sloppy mess.  One server left with one nasty carcass filled knife, only to return with an even dirtier knife. Um, Wolfies. Holy moly. The Woodlands location is a massacre of unacceptable dirtiness. Not repressing the experience is enough to make you throw up in your mouth — just a little.

Stepping into Bone Daddy’s was refreshing in the cleanest way. Were they dressed like almost ten dollar hookers? Yes. Were they doing their job, providing well above average service? Yes. A clean atmosphere with great service is just what every superior male belly needs.

Arriving with bells on, our server’s first words of wonder: “Hi. My name is Blossom.”

Blossom? Really? Um, I’m sorry. There is no way your name is Blossom. You may be selling, but this table is not buying. Nope. Not happening. As we began discussing name necessity, one theory emerged.

Maybe, just maybe, her name is Martha. Martha takes un-sexy to the next level of un-sexy name extreme. Not sexy for even one single second. Business lunchers probably fancy a kind of Betty Boop-ish moment upon hearing the name of their Bone Daddy babe for the day. “Blossom” rings in a manner fitting their forte. Martha? Not so much.

Eww. This guy ordered an 8 ounce chicken fried chicken breast smothered in creamy gravy and served with creamed corn, a cheese roll and garlic & chive whipped potatoes.

There were a total of 984 croutons in this salad. A full blown crouton massacre. So many croutons, a massive crouton hunt ensued.

Goal: Get rid of all croutons and ask for saltine crackers. Crunching up saltine crackers as a substitute for hardcore fattening butter crusted croutons is a clear win against the battle of the bulge.

Blossom was as sweet as the sugar in my Granny’s iced tea! She said it would be no problem to have grilled shrimp rather than fried, considering some of us aren’t big hungry men with teddy bear bellies, her substitution approval is appreciated.

This salad MUST satisfy every man’s mixed greens dream, having shrimp,  loads of cheddar cheese, tomato chunks, homemade croutons and smoked bacon. I begged Blossom for… no bacon.

So exciting to see was a super clean restaurant. CLEAN — CLEAN. Let’s say that one more time — CLEAN. It doesn’t matter what you wear, just keep it clean people.

These girls do not just have a job because of their body. They hold their own, even with the highest heels imaginable. Word on the street is they majorly make bank during every shift.

Even if servers are a shoe-in for strippers, the service was great and the restaurant was obviously well managed. This does not mean the food was all that, because it wasn’t.

NEXT UP: BIKINI’S BAR & GRILL.

FIVE: High 5!

FOUR: Please & Thank You

THREE: Yada

TWO: Double Wow

ONE: Wow + Ouch = Wouch


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2 thoughts on “Bone Daddy’s

  1. I have to say, when I heard about this blog entry from both my manager and co-workers I just had to read it for myself! I do want to tell you, yes, my real name is Blossom. We are in fact not a strip club, so we do not create “stage” names. As for the entry, here at bone daddy’s, we definitely appreciate the positivity! Our managers take pride in hiring girls that are down to earth and kind (in other words, will not create drama). That being said, I naturally have a happy demeanor, and would never compromise that to get any extra tip. All in all, thank you for your honesty, and glad we could give you a good experience!

  2. Hi. We really had a great time at Bone Daddy’s. Most importantly, the service you provided was excellent. You were very helpful with the changes to my salad order, even catching the cook before he added bacon. Every part of the experience was spot on. As for your name being Blossom, I think that’s great. With the uniform, heels, etc… the assumption was a part of the conversation my friend and I were having, which we found funny. Good News: Blossom is a pretty name and you aren’t just a pretty face. 🙂

    P.S. LOTS of guys ripped me a new one for the Blossom part of my article, so it’s extra exciting to hear the deal from you.

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