Américas – The Woodlands

My first visit to Américas was during happy hour at the Post Oak location in Houston. My experience was weak, to say the least, so I went to the Woodlands location the next day.

This place was pitiful. No bartender. No servers. No customers. The hostess seemed surprised as I entered the restaurant. The potential for dining happiness was present… The techno music was inviting, with the cool décor and couches that looked as though they were comfy beds.

The hostess quickly called the manager, who then informed me there was no one in the restaurant, and he would be taking care of me.

All of the apps ordered were at the Post Oak location, with dinner being in The Woodlands. The Corn Smoked Crab Fingers are served with yuka polenta and red pepper lemon butter. This appetizer is on the “social hour” menu. There wasn’t much of a social anything happening while I was dining at Américas.

I was really looking forward to the Lobster Corndogs. They were disappointing for several reasons. The breading was hard, cold, and tasted stale. The lobster was extremely small and tough, not tender as one would expect. The poblano dipping sauce helped, but there was no saving this app.

I ordered the Pargo Américas for my entrée. This corn crusted snapper is served with achiote grilled shrimp & lemon scented crème fraiche. It was terrific! Every part of my entrée was superb. Unfortunately, choking while having nothing to drink during my meal was a bit of a downer. Wuh Wah.

After taking my entrée order, I never saw the manager again. I’m pretty sure the mystery person delivering my food was the bus boy. The service at Américas was painful. I’d almost rather be in a room full of smokers.

As the crickets were chirping, the hostess finally came back from her break. Her job is like a full time break, isn’t it? Holy Hostess! The phone kept ringing and ringing and ringing… and ringing. I could have answered it. It would have been exciting.

The bartender suddenly came on board, filling the ice bin with anticipation of a big rush. He never greeted me. Not one word. I finally waved my white flag. I surrendered to the horrific service and begged to depart. Empty glass. Stale veggies. Disappearing manager/server. The hostess called to get someone to bring me a to-go box and my check. Um, let’s just go ahead and Double Wow this manager right now.

Manager Criteria at Américas:
Have one customer in the entire restaurant and get tired of waiting on them. Disappear. Get the 18 year old hostess to come back from her break to wait on UNO customer in the building. What’s worse than Saltgrass Steak House? Américas.

I waited for a to-go box for twenty minutes, while being the only non employee in the building, during the day. I felt like I was back at Saltgrass all over again.

Thanks. Thanks a lot. No. Don’t get up. I’m fine. I know how to use the Aloha System. I can print my own check. Sure. I’ll just go ahead and dump my leftovers in my purse. Oh, if you could find the time, maybe ask the valet guy out front if he could box it up for me.

Jeez Louise.

Almost Veggie Houston gives this restaurant a full blown WOUCH!

FIVE: High 5!
FOUR: Please & Thank You
TWO: Double Wow
ONE: Wow + Ouch = Wouch

View Larger Map

Américas on Urbanspoon

One thought on “Américas – The Woodlands

  1. I’m exhausted from counting the mistakes in your comment. Jeez. Read much? First of all, I stated I was first at the Americas on Post Oak. Due to my apps being weak on Post Oak, I headed over to the Woodlands later. I actually liked the food there. My entree was great. The service sucked. It was unexcusable. They were not busy and should be ashamed of the service given that day. I also stated I was eating in the bar. Although I appreciate your scary insight, you should brush up on your reading of articles before commenting. I’m going to go ahead and give you a Double Blog Reader Wow.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.