Gravitas ~ CLOSED

“I am very happy to be here… It took two hours to decide on the perfect spot for brunch… I finally chose Gravitas.”

These were the first words I spoke upon entering the building that would soon suck the life out of my afternoon. Sunday Brunch is a very big deal to a lot of people. The next hour was successfully painful, to say the least.

The bartender began telling stories of life as a Hooters girl. Apparently, she is a Hooters girl full time, sacrificing only Sundays to bartend at Gravitas. Not sure if the general population is aware of this, but a Hooters girl does not just look fabulous without intense preparation…

This bartender gives credit to the TCB room… This would be the “Take Care of Beauty” room. She explained the pains of being a Hooters girl… “It just isn’t plain easy.”

I am positive Hooters has quality service industry workers. Besides being skinny & attractive, they also wear the thickest of all thick socks, accompanied by tan pantyhose.

I started with the Grapefruit Ruby Red which is served with brown sugar. Initially, my dining experience appeared to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, not long after the grapefruit happiness occurred, did brunch entirely fall apart.

I decided on the Gravitas Caesar Salad served with lightly fried shrimp, anchovies, and topped with a… poached egg. The excitement I felt when seeing this as an option on the brunch menu was heavenly.

My salad arrived with no anchovies… and most importantly… no poached egg.

My salad instantly became completely common. The closest to brunch depression a foodie can experience is being offered an item of excitement, only to have it taken away, or to never arrive. This is when one would expect the manager to save the day.

Let’s talk about Sarah the Manager for a moment. She sat down and enjoyed her lunch at the bar, spending about twenty minutes contributing to the conversation, as well as having a few laughs here and there. Sarah is quite pleasant, reminding me of Katherine Heigl from Grey’s Anatomy.

Sarah is an all around great gal until… there is a problem.

Sarah had just finished eating when my salad arrived. I noticed my salad was missing every ingredient that was appealing when I decided to order it.

She said, “The kitchen sometimes doesn’t put anchovies on the salad when there are oysters or shrimp. I’m not sure about the poached egg… They must have forgotten.”

Really Sarah? Telling me “They must have forgotten” in no way solves the problem.
Sarah left and… I never saw her again.

Definition of Gravitas:
seriousness of behavior: a serious and solemn attitude or way of behaving

I would say this manager has a serious and solemn way of behaving… Become totally useless & disappear when a problem arises in the restaurant. What is it with managers that slip through the cracks when there is something in their job description to handle?

I am exhausted from giving Double Manager Wows, but Sarah Sucks, so she indeed earned one.

As I sat on my wobbly bar stool, the sound of tumbleweed could be heard as it began rolling from the bar to the kitchen.

For a moment, I thought I felt wind blowing through my hair… All I could do is stare at my salad in disbelief. Yes. There is a problem. I have before me… a lame Caesar salad with shrimp.

I let the bartender know that, as a customer, I would like someone to let the kitchen know that my order is incorrect. This is something she should already be doing, as well as… Sarah the Manager.

The bartender came back and said, “The kitchen is gone. They must have left when they finished making your salad. Oh, and you can’t order dessert… It is too late.”

I am going to have to sit on this one for a moment. Maybe I’m hearing things.

Okay, I’m ready… Hey, here’s an idea… Let the customer know they need to order dessert BEFORE it is too late. Or maybe… Consider it not too late because you seated the customer and already screwed up the entrée they ordered. Tell me I’m wrong.

This Hooters phenomenon mustered up a word to offer consolement during my non pleasant brunch experience: “Sorry.”

Really? You are sorry… Why are you sorry? Sorry that Sarah the Manager doesn’t realize part of her job description is to correct kitchen errors… Sorry you didn’t tell me the kitchen was closing and offer a dessert menu…

Unbelievable.

Here is what I am sorry about:
I am sorry that Gravitas thinks it is okay I did not receive what I ordered for brunch. I am also sorry that the staff isn’t experienced enough to know it is their job to tell the customer it is time to order… or not get dessert.

No. I finally had to say, you know, I want a dessert. I didn’t spend two hours deciding on a place for brunch to spend the afternoon with the wrong food & a Hooters girl. Sorry.

I sipped on my mimosa as she went to the kitchen, or maybe the office where Sarah the Manager is kicking back in a Lazy Boy recliner filing her nails. She returned with news I would, after all, be able to order dessert and that my entrée would be corrected.

I was under the impression someone was in the kitchen poaching an egg that would soon miraculously appear in front of me. I was wrong. The mistakes were never taken care of. I suppose I should be thankful the Lemon Tart with berries & crème anglaise arrived with the… Lemon Tart.

I had a feeling my Hooters friend was waiting for me to leave, since there were only two customers sitting in the bar. I asked and she confirmed… “Yes, I could leave if you were not here.” Awesome.

The highlight of my visit was taking a picture of my peace sign from the shadow at the front door… Seriously, the most exciting part of my visit to Gravitas. Wow.

Determined last weekend was a fluke, I decided to take my chances and spend Happy Hour at Gravitas on Tuesday. The website lists Happy Hour from 4:00 – 7:00 p.m. I went around 4:30 p.m. and the doors were locked.

This turned out to be a blessing. I left Gravitas and went to t’afia, Monica Pope’s restaurant on Taft. After experiencing t’afia, you will not catch Almost Veggie Houston back at Gravitas. Please & No Way!

Almost Veggie Houston gives this restaurant a full blown WOUCH!

FIVE: High 5!
FOUR: Please & Thank You
THREE: Yada
TWO: Double Wow
ONE: Wow + Ouch = Wouch


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