Cafe on the Green at The Four Seasons

crab-540x350Even though brunch at The Four Seasons is reserved for rich people, our very first wedding anniversary instantly made us worthy of rubbing elbows with the rich and famous. Without having lots of diamonds or even one single fur, I decided to wear my Claire’s Boutique sterling silver semi-diamond studs to brunch, along with a 2004 London Fog coat covering what seemed like a vintage black 1997 dress from Express.

It was so gross realizing my husband and I were none other than— special occasion customers. We might as well have rushed over to III Forks and waited for fireworks to shoot off at every special occasion table in the building. For those not in the know, please know a special occasion customer usually doesn’t get out much. These particular people only dine out for birthdays, anniversaries, and Valentine’s Day. No one in the service industry likes this. Everyone suddenly wants you to sing for them or do a Happy Birthday dance all over the restaurant.

I always hid when servers would desperately run into the kitchen begging other servers to sing with them. Landry’s, Inc. is the absolute worst company for doing this to servers. Oh, I’m sorry you have eight tables in your section and the bar and kitchen are both in the weeds, but as a part of your job description we are going to need you to stop, drop, and roll over to that table singing some kind of song. Really.

All I’m saying is some special occasion customers can be annoying to busy servers. The 91% usually don’t get out much and almost always complain before leaving an amateur tip. This is how I feel after waiting tables for more years than any commenter waiting to comment on how I’m wrong about special occasion customers.

Not wearing a fur didn’t seem to bother the hostess at The Four Seasons as she welcomed us with a huge smile. Even if this hostess was the meanest hostess in Texas, she still would have been nice to us because Open Table told her she had no other choice. Open Table asked me if Cafe on the Green at The Four Seasons needed to know anything particularly important about our reservation, which is also known as a special request. The space created for reservation people to explain how important the experience has to be is waiting for special occasion people to type each and every demand. This space is where communication with the hostess begins.

Special Occasion Demands:

1. Do not seat us at the worst table in the restaurant.

2. Please do not sing or say happy anything at any time.

3. Even though we are two, we will convulse before dying if seated at a two-top.

4. Our mimosas must explode with happiness and never be in the danger zone (almost empty).

Paying $45 per brunch buffet stings just a little unless it is a special occasion. Brunch at Cafe on the Green at The Four Seasons is extremely dreamy, minus the kid’s buffet. The best part ever was being in a room that didn’t really feel like it was filled with filthy rich eaters. Please do not be afraid of potential herds of wealth during dining. They either aren’t there or have secretly disguised themselves as commoners.


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FIVE: High 5!

FOUR: Please & Thank You


TWO: Double Wow

ONE: Wow + Ouch = Wouch
Four Seasons Resort & Club Dallas at Los Colinas
4150 N MacArthur Blvd
Irving, TX 75038



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